Feng & Shui

Since there's a wee bit of time to spare.
I shall blog, just for the sake of it. Regardless.

Here we go.

"I'm coming now," was what Liew said to me, 20 minutes ago. We are gonna meet up for lunch at Subway. On the phone 2 nights ago, I was on the phone with him, "Dude, the feng-shui optimized name card you did for me has made me lazy!" he moans on the other line, "How?"

For those who don't know. Earlier this year, I visited Ju's mom to settle my car's insurance. And to those who knows her mom, she's THE feng-shui junkie on the island if not the whole country. Heck, Lilian Too would look like an amateur next to her. Of course, after settling the insurance issue, she couldn't resist. She really couldn't. Hence I got a crash course in Feng-Shui 101 from her. The basics. She taught me the way of the compass. Just the basic one, not those intricate device real feng-shui masters use. Based on this, she taught me how to place furniture, where we should have a water-feature, paintings and so on to optimized various kinds of fortunes. Wealth, health and even ways to stress out your colleagues. Cheeky. But I don't want to do that, come on, I'm a nice guy. At the end of the day, she even game me one of her compasses. Complete with a red bag. With some chinese wordings on it.

What surprised me was, "Ah Meng," no offense, I hate it when people add an Ah in front of my name, it just makes me sound...small, "Are you stressed? Over-worked?" she asks.

"Well yeah," I replied, "Very, in fact" I concluded.

"Of course you are," she lifts my name card, covering her face, her fingers slithers around me card, "This is because the placement of your company logo, your name isn't at its most optimized location," she points at me and place the name card on the table.

She went on a detail explanation which I have forgotten, but it shook me as it was spot on, "Wah, this is amazingly accurate," stunned at her discovery, "So what should I do?"

She grabbed a piece of paper and started scribbling, "Start off by dividing your name card into 9 equal spaces," then she grabbed a pen and started writing inside these little boxes, "This part is for ASSET, this is for POTENTIAL..." and proceeded to fill in the remaining 7. "So you need to place your name here, the logo here, address here. Avoid this portion," she pointed out. She wrote it in caps, it reads STRESS.

"Right," I said to her. Of course we need to avoid there.

"By placing it like this," she points her fingers here and there, "That means the company will support you, rather than you supporting the company," she says the old layout would stress the crap out of everyone.

To be honest with you, it does work. To some extend. Yes, the stress is still there. But this stress is more tolerable, it's the type of stress where we'd go, "There's a light at the end of the tunnel," not running aimlessly not knowing what's gonna happen. And the company is doing fine. Albeit some hick-ups now and then.

Back to Liew...

"Well, at least the stress is gone, yes?" I say. He couldn't agree more.

As we were having lunch - sponsored by him - he told me, "Actually, ever since the new name card design you did, business is better," citing that and proceeded to pay for my Subway sandwich. Number 7 on the menu.

I quickly munch on me sandwich, "See! Hah, it works magic doesn't it?" followed by a giant bite. A piece of meat fell onto the tray, "However, it's still up to you. You can just rely on this to prosper, right?"

He placed his cookie on the table and went on to light a Dunhill, "Of course."



So now you know. I have been feng-shui-ed.
You can call me for feng-shui advise from now on. But only regarding name cards, heh.

Refer to me as Sifu Meng. If not I will not entertain. :P
And no, you will not get a free compass.