Because the internet took a massive slow-turn, due to the Taiwan Quake.
Because it’s such a bloody bitch to log in to Blogger.
Because I have a big presentation on the 4th.
Because we have to organize a last minute New Year party crew.
Because we still – technically – have no idea what to do.
That’s why, I haven’t been updating much.
OK, we do in fact know where we’re going. It’s SIGIs at Batu Ferringhi. Yeah, why you ask? Well, the jam to town is just not worth it anymore. Roby is doing his thing at RM100 per person for the 5litre bottle, we say; “Fuck that,” and look to Vendass -- our trusty alcohol supplier -- “How much for a carton of beer?”
“Tiger?” he asks, “Or Carlsberg?”
Together in perfect sync, we say, “Tiger!”
He looks into space, “RM80,” he says.
Cool. Settled then. Derek is offering his whiskey; I say we call it a Plan B, since none of us wanna get plastered. But it’s for good measure, of course. So we’ll tuck it under the seat. Cause there’s no such thing as too much alcohol, only too little. So I decided to throw in my magic will-get-me-laid bottle of JINRO. The ladies love it.
“I’ll pack in some herbs too,” I declare, “That will be our Plan C.”
“Our Plan C?” he asks.
“Sorry, I mean MY Plan C,” I correct myself.
So there you go. If you’re bored, broke and up for some fun. You know where to find us.
Happy New Year and drive safely.
See you soon.
Sunday, 31 December 2006
Saturday, 30 December 2006
Friday, 29 December 2006
One More, One More! Argh!
Maybe I stretch too much.
Maybe it’s some sort of diet I’m on. (Who am I kidding?)
Perhaps I jump a lot? (Heck, I don’t do that)
But whatever it is
I gained another centimeter.
Yes.
1 flippin' cm!
That brings the tally to 189cm
One more to go, one more.
Then I’ll hit the 190cm mark.
But frankly.
For the first time…ever,
I’m actually frightened.
I mean, who grows taller at 23?
NORMAL people stop about 18-21.
And just went I was happy and content with 188cm
It shoots up another notch. (Yes, I measured up barefoot)
And what’s up with places like Torch and 68 Brazil?
Damn tallist I tell you.
Their toilet doors are only 6’ tall.
WTF? Banging my head against the frame isn’t funny ok? No it’s not. OK, maybe the first 3 times, after that its just abso-fucking-lutely annoying.
Maybe it’s some sort of diet I’m on. (Who am I kidding?)
Perhaps I jump a lot? (Heck, I don’t do that)
But whatever it is
I gained another centimeter.
Yes.
1 flippin' cm!
That brings the tally to 189cm
One more to go, one more.
Then I’ll hit the 190cm mark.
But frankly.
For the first time…ever,
I’m actually frightened.
I mean, who grows taller at 23?
NORMAL people stop about 18-21.
And just went I was happy and content with 188cm
It shoots up another notch. (Yes, I measured up barefoot)
And what’s up with places like Torch and 68 Brazil?
Damn tallist I tell you.
Their toilet doors are only 6’ tall.
WTF? Banging my head against the frame isn’t funny ok? No it’s not. OK, maybe the first 3 times, after that its just abso-fucking-lutely annoying.
Thursday, 28 December 2006
Flammable
I was at a club once,
It was packed, shoulder-to-shoulder.
So I decided to stand at the fire-exit.
Where it’s less crowded, to scope the scene.
This bouncer came up to me and said,
“Move! You’re blocking the fire-exit!”
…
As if there was a fire…
I wasn’t gonna run.
(Ian, shaddup)
It was packed, shoulder-to-shoulder.
So I decided to stand at the fire-exit.
Where it’s less crowded, to scope the scene.
This bouncer came up to me and said,
“Move! You’re blocking the fire-exit!”
…
As if there was a fire…
I wasn’t gonna run.
(Ian, shaddup)
Thursday, 21 December 2006
Improvised
The only person in our house who put in the effort to put up and decorate a Christmas tree is my sister. Strange thing is that she doesn't even live here anymore. So...
Tah-dah
A tree, fully decked out, albeit the missing flashy/blinking lights.
Now I'm curious...why is Elmo deputizing the big Star? Mhmmm...
Tah-dah
A tree, fully decked out, albeit the missing flashy/blinking lights.
Now I'm curious...why is Elmo deputizing the big Star? Mhmmm...
Wednesday, 20 December 2006
Bee Em Double Leu
We were at Sim’s. Prepping up the night’s agenda. Tuck has also stop making orgasmic sounds seating on Sim’s sensational new massage chair. We head out to meet him – Sina – who had just arrive and is parked outside.
“Wait for us, we’re coming out now,” says Sim as he heads back into his room looking for me.
“Sorry man, forgot my trusty little compass,” I justified my unhurried conduct.
We headed out and I resumed by new-found feng-shui knowledge to Sim about why he should have a water-feature flowing water from North into the front door. Not literally lah.
What struck me was when I saw him, still seated inside his car listening to Broken Social Scene, was that he was driving this white Wira, which he’s brother owns. I took my place at the back seat, “It’s been a long time lah,” I clarify my motive, “I’m so sick of the front seat.” as I head to the back seat.
“Dude!” I exclaimed, “I never thought I live the day to see Pedram allowing you to drive his car!”
“It’s not his car anymore dude,” he feels the steering, “He drives a Beemer now.”
A what?! Damn. That’s one massive upgrade, “Wow, that’s fantastic. Good for him.”
Sina shifts the gear into D and we’re now headed to 7-Eleven, “Yeah, he’s a much happier person these days, less tantrums, not stressed-out and all. Hell, I can even have long decent conversations with him nowadays. I’m so happy for him.”
Of course lah he’s happy. Who wouldn’t be less bitter, cheerier and satisfied when you’re driving a BMW. Come on lah, it’s a Beemer wei. With the prospect (based on statistics) that BMW drivers get about 2.2 sex per week. What’s there to be bitter about, really.
“Wait for us, we’re coming out now,” says Sim as he heads back into his room looking for me.
“Sorry man, forgot my trusty little compass,” I justified my unhurried conduct.
We headed out and I resumed by new-found feng-shui knowledge to Sim about why he should have a water-feature flowing water from North into the front door. Not literally lah.
What struck me was when I saw him, still seated inside his car listening to Broken Social Scene, was that he was driving this white Wira, which he’s brother owns. I took my place at the back seat, “It’s been a long time lah,” I clarify my motive, “I’m so sick of the front seat.” as I head to the back seat.
“Dude!” I exclaimed, “I never thought I live the day to see Pedram allowing you to drive his car!”
“It’s not his car anymore dude,” he feels the steering, “He drives a Beemer now.”
A what?! Damn. That’s one massive upgrade, “Wow, that’s fantastic. Good for him.”
Sina shifts the gear into D and we’re now headed to 7-Eleven, “Yeah, he’s a much happier person these days, less tantrums, not stressed-out and all. Hell, I can even have long decent conversations with him nowadays. I’m so happy for him.”
Of course lah he’s happy. Who wouldn’t be less bitter, cheerier and satisfied when you’re driving a BMW. Come on lah, it’s a Beemer wei. With the prospect (based on statistics) that BMW drivers get about 2.2 sex per week. What’s there to be bitter about, really.
Tuesday, 19 December 2006
Bison
For the past 3 days,
I’ve been rolling up my own cigarettes in the office.
What strikes me is that
no one has stop and gawk at this unusual routine.
I’m beginning to think -- what if I roll up something else.
Would they realize?
I’ve been rolling up my own cigarettes in the office.
What strikes me is that
no one has stop and gawk at this unusual routine.
I’m beginning to think -- what if I roll up something else.
Would they realize?
Friday, 15 December 2006
Unrelenting
Phone rings…
“Hello?”
“Hello Thanga?”
“Thang who?”
“Ini Thangarajan ah?????”
“Bukan, wrong number…”
“Wrong number ar? Ini bukan 01X-XXXX XXXX??”
“Hello! Kira tengok berapa nombor you dial!”
“XXXX XXXX lah”
“Handphone 7 nombor only lah!”
“Tapi namecard dia ada 8 nombor..”
“So?!”
“Tapi…”
Hangs up.
Damn fucking stubborn man I tell you. (And dumb)
“Hello?”
“Hello Thanga?”
“Thang who?”
“Ini Thangarajan ah?????”
“Bukan, wrong number…”
“Wrong number ar? Ini bukan 01X-XXXX XXXX??”
“Hello! Kira tengok berapa nombor you dial!”
“XXXX XXXX lah”
“Handphone 7 nombor only lah!”
“Tapi namecard dia ada 8 nombor..”
“So?!”
“Tapi…”
Hangs up.
Damn fucking stubborn man I tell you. (And dumb)
Thursday, 14 December 2006
Bukit Boring
Well…
Sad to say, our first ever company outing was quite disastrous. Location-wise that is. A word of caution to ya’ll out there. Under no circumstances or reason (or excuse) should you ever, ever (or even think of) considering Bukit Merah as a potential holiday destination. Especially during school holidays!
The theme park is ridiculous and borderline toxic if you should find yourself in the waters for whatever reason. The park spots an eerie resemblance to pre-school, hell, even pre-schools aren’t so horribly coloured.
Of course, the people there has no sense of business. The paint-ball dude never got back to us. Even at one point decided to shut his phone off completely. It wasn’t a great setting anyway so we let it slide. Besides, having only 50 bullets ain’t much fun. Heck my room is even bigger than the terrain.
Ecstasy pill poppers or LSD addicts might find themselves feeling very at-home here. The management has some strange obsession with the over-the-top-and-extremely-tacky feng-tau pounding music. As if the food (oh the food, nooooo) aren’t bad enough, they pound your ears with ‘em pill popping noise and except you to swallow that bowl of god-knows what, whereby they have a pretty pathetic and a strange no-re-fund policy if you over buy your meal coupons. WTF is that all about? Nothing in the food court is edible.
And yes, it rained 80% of the time.
On the brighter side, the night cruise was oddly amusing. Though I don’t see the point in having a tour guide stuttering to us about what is what in the dark, it wasn’t all that bad. The water was calm; the air was cool. And who would have thought our cruise ride had a night safari tour included! Another – mostly pointless – tour in the dark. Don’t they get it? We humans have lousy sight at night. Some cages were lit. Including the crocodiles’. Which basically was the highlight of the entire trip.
Yes, we get to watch them feed ‘em crocs live chickens! Gah! It was disgusting…and cruel to some extent. Hell, you would think they snap up the chickens and swallow them up instantly. Hell no, they snap, then they pause. One loooooong pause. With chicken still firmly clam down in their jaws. Blood oozing, dripping to the ground, chicken spasm. Yucks. And finally after 20 minutes, “I think I’ll swallow now,” and voula.
That fucker even farted after eating. They do that?
All in all, the bottle of Absolut and copious amount of Carlsberg made the trip less appalling. Let’s just say I won’t be expecting any of my colleagues or bosses to play the Wheel of Fortune, Bluff, Pyramid and Names drinking game with me anytime soon. Yes, I made all of them puke. Even myself. But I consider myself the survivor having puke only once! Heh.
That was fun. The trip was nice, but the location was terrible.
So remember, say Tak Nak to Bukit Merah! Buck up lah! Visit Malaysia 2007 coming up!
Sad to say, our first ever company outing was quite disastrous. Location-wise that is. A word of caution to ya’ll out there. Under no circumstances or reason (or excuse) should you ever, ever (or even think of) considering Bukit Merah as a potential holiday destination. Especially during school holidays!
The theme park is ridiculous and borderline toxic if you should find yourself in the waters for whatever reason. The park spots an eerie resemblance to pre-school, hell, even pre-schools aren’t so horribly coloured.
Of course, the people there has no sense of business. The paint-ball dude never got back to us. Even at one point decided to shut his phone off completely. It wasn’t a great setting anyway so we let it slide. Besides, having only 50 bullets ain’t much fun. Heck my room is even bigger than the terrain.
Ecstasy pill poppers or LSD addicts might find themselves feeling very at-home here. The management has some strange obsession with the over-the-top-and-extremely-tacky feng-tau pounding music. As if the food (oh the food, nooooo) aren’t bad enough, they pound your ears with ‘em pill popping noise and except you to swallow that bowl of god-knows what, whereby they have a pretty pathetic and a strange no-re-fund policy if you over buy your meal coupons. WTF is that all about? Nothing in the food court is edible.
And yes, it rained 80% of the time.
On the brighter side, the night cruise was oddly amusing. Though I don’t see the point in having a tour guide stuttering to us about what is what in the dark, it wasn’t all that bad. The water was calm; the air was cool. And who would have thought our cruise ride had a night safari tour included! Another – mostly pointless – tour in the dark. Don’t they get it? We humans have lousy sight at night. Some cages were lit. Including the crocodiles’. Which basically was the highlight of the entire trip.
Yes, we get to watch them feed ‘em crocs live chickens! Gah! It was disgusting…and cruel to some extent. Hell, you would think they snap up the chickens and swallow them up instantly. Hell no, they snap, then they pause. One loooooong pause. With chicken still firmly clam down in their jaws. Blood oozing, dripping to the ground, chicken spasm. Yucks. And finally after 20 minutes, “I think I’ll swallow now,” and voula.
That fucker even farted after eating. They do that?
All in all, the bottle of Absolut and copious amount of Carlsberg made the trip less appalling. Let’s just say I won’t be expecting any of my colleagues or bosses to play the Wheel of Fortune, Bluff, Pyramid and Names drinking game with me anytime soon. Yes, I made all of them puke. Even myself. But I consider myself the survivor having puke only once! Heh.
That was fun. The trip was nice, but the location was terrible.
So remember, say Tak Nak to Bukit Merah! Buck up lah! Visit Malaysia 2007 coming up!
Wednesday, 6 December 2006
I Want To Be A Film-maker
Sometimes I wonder when will I ever get to make that first feature length film I’ve always dream about. Not that I’ve already written the script and screenplay, but I just have some rough ideas that has been floating about. Maybe I just need an angle.
Let’s face it. My life is boring. Boo hoo. That’s out. OK, moving on. I need something with more substance. Then I thought, well maybe I could use the stories of people I’ve met, family, friends, etc and make up an entirely fictional story…based on true ones. Come on, nothing beats real human stories. And I’ve heard, seen and experience some weird ones.
Then the day job I have. Will I ever get my breakthrough and then progress? That’s one to ponder on.
Of course, the finance I’ll need to fund the production…hmmm, where, where , where?
All I know is, I wanna have a storyline with compelling human stories. The break it into pieces and sequence it in a random fashion…but of course it’s not entirely random, it’s carefully re-organized to add suspense. Kinda like the college video project we did. I showed bits and pieces of the ending first. But 6 minutes of footage isn’t enough to do the whole -- re-sequence the story -- thing.
Oh well -- I’m done with this meaningless entry.
Futsal! Wooo…
Let’s face it. My life is boring. Boo hoo. That’s out. OK, moving on. I need something with more substance. Then I thought, well maybe I could use the stories of people I’ve met, family, friends, etc and make up an entirely fictional story…based on true ones. Come on, nothing beats real human stories. And I’ve heard, seen and experience some weird ones.
Then the day job I have. Will I ever get my breakthrough and then progress? That’s one to ponder on.
Of course, the finance I’ll need to fund the production…hmmm, where, where , where?
All I know is, I wanna have a storyline with compelling human stories. The break it into pieces and sequence it in a random fashion…but of course it’s not entirely random, it’s carefully re-organized to add suspense. Kinda like the college video project we did. I showed bits and pieces of the ending first. But 6 minutes of footage isn’t enough to do the whole -- re-sequence the story -- thing.
Oh well -- I’m done with this meaningless entry.
Futsal! Wooo…
Monday, 4 December 2006
Till We Meet Again
Frankly, I’ve never felt so sad to see any relatives leave.
I guess this one is an exception. They were fantastic throughout.
Taxing at times. But all worth it. Definitely.
And who would have thought there were furniture shops that open till way pass midnight in Penang.
My parents thought she was a tad long-winded, I thought it was only border-line. Hell, after all, we last met 11 years ago. Of course there’s plenty to talk about. Heh. It's amazing how 2 weeks can bridge back the 11 years being apart. At least we're no longer strangers and that's lovely.
Hope we’ll see you guys again soon. In Melbourne, maybe? Heh. Then you guys will help me hook-up with some blonds, eh? :)
Take care.
I guess this one is an exception. They were fantastic throughout.
Taxing at times. But all worth it. Definitely.
And who would have thought there were furniture shops that open till way pass midnight in Penang.
My parents thought she was a tad long-winded, I thought it was only border-line. Hell, after all, we last met 11 years ago. Of course there’s plenty to talk about. Heh. It's amazing how 2 weeks can bridge back the 11 years being apart. At least we're no longer strangers and that's lovely.
Hope we’ll see you guys again soon. In Melbourne, maybe? Heh. Then you guys will help me hook-up with some blonds, eh? :)
Take care.
Friday, 1 December 2006
Beautiful Day
This is how anal my dad can get when it comes to time. When he says meet him at 8.30am, that means 8.30am. Heck, I was only 3 minutes late. Still, I got his usual "Why are you late?" treatment. He restarted his journey and off to Parkroyal we go.
Sim taking a nap. Apparently having 5-6 hours worth of sleep isn't enough. OK, I agree with him. The mandatory 8-hour is a must. But hey, we're going on a day-long vacation. Relek ler brather!
That's my cousin in the center. They were on time. Daddy likes that. So they get free breakfast! Tuck, Diana and Annie still no where to be seen. "Meng, you and your friends are alike! Never punctual!"
Gee, tell me something new dad. I was frantically calling them. Rushing them. Especially Annie, she's still far behind. But arrived at the knick of time. *Phew* Off we go.
Tuck, Diana and Sim soaking up the sun. Getting wet along the way. They don't mind that.
Look at that man. Shining gila.
By wearing this mask, we established that Diana had more guts than Tuck. Cos she wore 'em masks too and was eager to dive in. Tuck settled for fishing. Using the excuse that we had to fish our lunch.
We all know that isn't true.
Sadly, the water isn't as clear as it should be. So you can Imagine the thrill of not getting stung by those huge jellyfishes we saw. Crinkey! They were the size of 2 basketballs each. You won't want that nasty thing near you.
After seeing enough jellyfishes, I chicken out with the rest and settled for fishing. Me and Annie form a formidable team of Champions.
We failed to catch anything.
Nostalgia man. I use to come here often 10 years ago.
The 3 losers who couldn't catch anything.
This pic made her look like some Goddess. But not a fishing goddess. She suck at it (heh)
My cousin's secret code, "Meng, let's take a walk."
That means it's my cue to have a smoke. They just tag along for free smokes.
"What siput? Where got?"
Dudes, they are hidden in sand lah. You gotta dig 'em.
Of course, nothing beats good old "slightly modernize" Gurney Drive hawker centre to finish off such a lovely day. My god, she went on a rampage and ordered almost everything. I mean everything. Hell, I had 3 glasses of orange juice to wash all that down. And struggled to walk.
We should so do that again.
And I should re-write this entry.
Laters.
Sim taking a nap. Apparently having 5-6 hours worth of sleep isn't enough. OK, I agree with him. The mandatory 8-hour is a must. But hey, we're going on a day-long vacation. Relek ler brather!
That's my cousin in the center. They were on time. Daddy likes that. So they get free breakfast! Tuck, Diana and Annie still no where to be seen. "Meng, you and your friends are alike! Never punctual!"
Gee, tell me something new dad. I was frantically calling them. Rushing them. Especially Annie, she's still far behind. But arrived at the knick of time. *Phew* Off we go.
Tuck, Diana and Sim soaking up the sun. Getting wet along the way. They don't mind that.
Look at that man. Shining gila.
By wearing this mask, we established that Diana had more guts than Tuck. Cos she wore 'em masks too and was eager to dive in. Tuck settled for fishing. Using the excuse that we had to fish our lunch.
We all know that isn't true.
Sadly, the water isn't as clear as it should be. So you can Imagine the thrill of not getting stung by those huge jellyfishes we saw. Crinkey! They were the size of 2 basketballs each. You won't want that nasty thing near you.
After seeing enough jellyfishes, I chicken out with the rest and settled for fishing. Me and Annie form a formidable team of Champions.
We failed to catch anything.
Nostalgia man. I use to come here often 10 years ago.
The 3 losers who couldn't catch anything.
This pic made her look like some Goddess. But not a fishing goddess. She suck at it (heh)
My cousin's secret code, "Meng, let's take a walk."
That means it's my cue to have a smoke. They just tag along for free smokes.
"What siput? Where got?"
Dudes, they are hidden in sand lah. You gotta dig 'em.
Of course, nothing beats good old "slightly modernize" Gurney Drive hawker centre to finish off such a lovely day. My god, she went on a rampage and ordered almost everything. I mean everything. Hell, I had 3 glasses of orange juice to wash all that down. And struggled to walk.
We should so do that again.
And I should re-write this entry.
Laters.
Monday, 27 November 2006
Miracles
Sometimes, in our relentless efforts to find the person we love -- we fail to recognize and appreciate the people who love us. We miss out on so many beautiful things and simply because we allow ourselves to been slaved by our own selfish concerns.There are two ways to live your life.
One is as though nothing is a miracle,
the other is as though everything is a miracle.
Sunday, 26 November 2006
Beach, Sun & Sand
It’s been ages since my last visit there.
Come Wednesday, its Coral Island, revisited.
Since they have been bitching about my dad having his own boat and us not utilizing such a resource. Well, here…now here’s our chance!
Beach, sand, sun, clear water, fishing, beer. Mhmmmm…not to mention my dad’s specialty BBQ lunch. Fabulous. So now I have the luxury to pick up to 3 people to tag along with me.
Free of charge.
Yes, you heard me.
Now, be nice.
Come Wednesday, its Coral Island, revisited.
Since they have been bitching about my dad having his own boat and us not utilizing such a resource. Well, here…now here’s our chance!
Beach, sand, sun, clear water, fishing, beer. Mhmmmm…not to mention my dad’s specialty BBQ lunch. Fabulous. So now I have the luxury to pick up to 3 people to tag along with me.
Free of charge.
Yes, you heard me.
Now, be nice.
Living at Sea
Splashsplashsplashsplash“Oh god, are we actually gonna paddle all the way to Pulau Tikus?” Tuck looks ahead – not that he has much of a choice – to look elsewhere, since he was on the front, front was his only view. In the distance, almost pinch sized version of Sim and James on an orange canoe was just before the horizon. In front of them is the very rocky Pulau Tikus.
I couldn’t be bothered to go that far. We’re unfit and we didn’t mind. After having to go to shore and grab our beers, we were back out again, in between beach and Pulau Tikus, I took a sip of beer and a puff of Dunhill Lights, “Do you think they’ll make it ah?”
“Hah, I think they just might pull it off,” Tuck replied, taking a sip of his beer too. “Where did you throw the butts?”
“Inside the canoe.”
“Seriously, I don’t think they’ll make it,” I declared to Tuck, seeing that they can’t even go straight. Zig zagging your way to Pulau Tikus can be very taxing. Even if you were a former state champion in Badminton. “Seems like Sim is making life difficult for James.”
Tuck laughs it off, “Yeah, whats up with them?” he said, “Damn semangat, go so far.”
“Well, I don’t mind trying,” sipping my beer, lighting yet another Lights – we could make it to the island, but coming back would be a real problem, “But look at that,” pointing towards the horizon where dark clouds were gathering, sky spraying mist of rain, “I won’t wanna be there when it rains.”
“Yeah wei, Tsunami!”
WHAT?! Sure…
I spot a jelly fish, “I can swim, but I won’t wanna be in the water,” starts whacking the damn jelly with my paddle, “Fucking jellyfishes.”
“Oh man, they’re everywhere!” he looks left and right, “It’s like a fucking incentive to stay afloat!”
As I crushed my Tiger can, “Crap, I need to pee.” I whined.
“Dude, bad timing man, I’m too tired to paddle back now, just stand up pee lah,” that little dude suggests.
“You sure you want me to stand?” scoops up a jellyfish, “with so many of these inside the water?”
“Ok, bad idea.”
But I stood up anyway, not to pee, but just to freak the crap out of Tuck. And shake the canoe a little. For a little bit of drama.
“OI FUCKERRRR…NOOOO!!!!”
That action didn’t justify his gangster background. “Oh man, are they heading back yet? I’m bored and we’re almost out of beers.”
From the looks of it, they were getting bigger and bigger, we could almost see their faces, “Yeah, looks like it,” Tucks speaks, “Doesn’t look like a successful voyage.”
We had to reverse paddle to avoid getting nasty T-bone collision with the overly buffed and strangely motivated Dragon Boat. That was the 4th time we had to dodge them. True enough, Tuck got it spot on. They never made it. Agonizingly close, but never made it.
“Damn tiring huh?” beams Sim while James was bitching about Sim’s utter inability to paddle straight. “But you said I did alright!”
Oh what bunch of girls, “Here, please finish the can.”
“You guys had beer without us?!”
I gotta say, I’ve never canoe before. Yes, shame. Seeing my dad used to run Watersports. It never look like fun, I prefer wind powered or engine powered vessels. I so see myself going again next week. Hoping for better weather too.
Anyone?
And bring Vinegar. Just in case.
Or would you rather pee on yourself?
Or worst…have a friend pee on you.
You decide.
Away
Imagine a place…
So serene, disconnected and soothing.
Imagine not having…
Your phone, wallet and whatever else that ties you down.
Imagine what you could achieve with so little.
Frankly, it’s not that hard to imagine.
All it costs is no more than RM10 to get away from it all.
One hour of pure bliss.
Before you get a billion miss calls on your phone.
Then you’ll know reality sucks.
I hate reality.
So serene, disconnected and soothing.
Imagine not having…
Your phone, wallet and whatever else that ties you down.
Imagine what you could achieve with so little.
Frankly, it’s not that hard to imagine.
All it costs is no more than RM10 to get away from it all.
One hour of pure bliss.
Before you get a billion miss calls on your phone.
Then you’ll know reality sucks.
I hate reality.
Thursday, 23 November 2006
Working Out
You know you’re all worked out when your friends stop calling you at night, assuming you’re still at work – which is the case most of the time anyway – and go ahead with their plans.
Last night, we finally had that dinner with our (Ju’s) aunt (my cousin, though she should be my aunt, but you know I have a weird family tree). It’ll be strange however it turns out, whatever gifts she’ll buy for me. It’s not that I’m shallow or superficial, it’s just that, despite being cousins, she is after all just a stranger to me. I do not know her. My first sight of her was a photograph of her and my sister (when sis was only 2). All my knowledge about her was hearing stories told from my parents or my other cousins. So I have this mixed up, collage rendition of her. It'll be great to hear it from her instead. Get my facts straight.
She did unintentionally say that I was snobbish towards her, jokingly. But that’s me when I was young, “I wasn’t being snobbish lah, I’m just one blur child when we last met,” I said. “I like to stare at things when I was young. And leave when I lose interest,” I guess that’s why observe things so well.
Like all family dinner we have, everyone likes gunning down Ju with her somewhat unconventional lifestyle. Me, of course, the angel…I get nothing. But of course, I do suspect they know I’m not as angelic as it seems. Maybe my height intimidates them.
Then there’s A, my cousin's cool aussie-boyfriend.
At Parkroyal, when he came over to our room to pickup his stash, I can’t help but feeling all weird. Even though we all do it – putting a different persona in front of family – it’s just strange seeing someone else doing it too. I think he was expecting some sort of goodbye or good night family hug when he was gonna head back up. It didn’t register in my head, so I just sat there, on the other end of the room, “Alright, have a good night!” and remain seated with my bloodshot red eyes (fatigue + beer!), though it seems like he was gonna come over. Sim was still blabbing about something, but I wasn’t really listening. My thoughts were loud. Not out loud. He seems disappointed and that made me feel bad. But I was too drunk and stoned at that time.
Oh, and I watched Casino Royale the other day. I must say, that first chase scene was kinda, extreme, no? Come on. From snake pit to crane top. WTF?! The car didn’t last very long too. Isn’t it the same bloody Aston Martin from the previous movie? And to those who don't know, that black dude is a YAMAKAZI, they do that. Run around, jumping up weird places and all.
I just can’t wait for the week to be over. Deadlines the whole week. Whole week! Gah! At least our pay arrived today.
Last night, we finally had that dinner with our (Ju’s) aunt (my cousin, though she should be my aunt, but you know I have a weird family tree). It’ll be strange however it turns out, whatever gifts she’ll buy for me. It’s not that I’m shallow or superficial, it’s just that, despite being cousins, she is after all just a stranger to me. I do not know her. My first sight of her was a photograph of her and my sister (when sis was only 2). All my knowledge about her was hearing stories told from my parents or my other cousins. So I have this mixed up, collage rendition of her. It'll be great to hear it from her instead. Get my facts straight.
She did unintentionally say that I was snobbish towards her, jokingly. But that’s me when I was young, “I wasn’t being snobbish lah, I’m just one blur child when we last met,” I said. “I like to stare at things when I was young. And leave when I lose interest,” I guess that’s why observe things so well.
Like all family dinner we have, everyone likes gunning down Ju with her somewhat unconventional lifestyle. Me, of course, the angel…I get nothing. But of course, I do suspect they know I’m not as angelic as it seems. Maybe my height intimidates them.
Then there’s A, my cousin's cool aussie-boyfriend.
At Parkroyal, when he came over to our room to pickup his stash, I can’t help but feeling all weird. Even though we all do it – putting a different persona in front of family – it’s just strange seeing someone else doing it too. I think he was expecting some sort of goodbye or good night family hug when he was gonna head back up. It didn’t register in my head, so I just sat there, on the other end of the room, “Alright, have a good night!” and remain seated with my bloodshot red eyes (fatigue + beer!), though it seems like he was gonna come over. Sim was still blabbing about something, but I wasn’t really listening. My thoughts were loud. Not out loud. He seems disappointed and that made me feel bad. But I was too drunk and stoned at that time.
Oh, and I watched Casino Royale the other day. I must say, that first chase scene was kinda, extreme, no? Come on. From snake pit to crane top. WTF?! The car didn’t last very long too. Isn’t it the same bloody Aston Martin from the previous movie? And to those who don't know, that black dude is a YAMAKAZI, they do that. Run around, jumping up weird places and all.
I just can’t wait for the week to be over. Deadlines the whole week. Whole week! Gah! At least our pay arrived today.
Wednesday, 15 November 2006
Tuesday, 14 November 2006
Sunday, 12 November 2006
Tanning in the Rain
I’ve come to terms with nature’s revulsion for me being under the sun. 3 out of 3 attempts at tanning ended up in me (and them) sprinting to the car, lugging our bags and mat to the car.
Because I’m there, it had to rain.
“I don’t like the sound of that,” sighs the neighbour, barely 3 seconds after hearing the first of a series of thunder that followed later.
I’m trying my best to keep my eyes away from the soaring sun, crinkling my face, “Yeah, we should have at least a good 2 hours before it arrives,” I told her. Trying to sound like the weather expert like my dad is. Trying.
Ju and Sim are hiding under the shades, dubbed the Putera and Puteri Lilin. Conversing about the pros and cons about being in a long-distance relationship.
Of course, some big ass cloud had to block the sun. Impending rain was imminent. So at first drizzle, we quickly pack and head to the car.
So…
Is there some sort of ritual I should do (or dance) before I go tanning?
Just to add insult to injury – the same pattern happened in Langkawi – back in June. So I’m all ears now.
Because I’m there, it had to rain.
“I don’t like the sound of that,” sighs the neighbour, barely 3 seconds after hearing the first of a series of thunder that followed later.
I’m trying my best to keep my eyes away from the soaring sun, crinkling my face, “Yeah, we should have at least a good 2 hours before it arrives,” I told her. Trying to sound like the weather expert like my dad is. Trying.
Ju and Sim are hiding under the shades, dubbed the Putera and Puteri Lilin. Conversing about the pros and cons about being in a long-distance relationship.
Of course, some big ass cloud had to block the sun. Impending rain was imminent. So at first drizzle, we quickly pack and head to the car.
So…
Is there some sort of ritual I should do (or dance) before I go tanning?
Just to add insult to injury – the same pattern happened in Langkawi – back in June. So I’m all ears now.
Thursday, 9 November 2006
Funky Yellow
It’s been a week since I had a proper functioning PC. Early this morning, I finally manage to get to the bottom of it. Turns out – I hope – it was just an error with the AGP card driver which causes my screen to turn funky, then laggy. I'm talking about 486-lagging kinda thing.
Since when did AMD merged (or bought over) ATI?
Still seeing yellow, I think I can finally put up the other monitor again and go for a test run. It’s impossible to turn down yet another work to ease this month’s tight finances. I need the money, badly.
OK, I’m done with this pointless entry.
Since when did AMD merged (or bought over) ATI?
Still seeing yellow, I think I can finally put up the other monitor again and go for a test run. It’s impossible to turn down yet another work to ease this month’s tight finances. I need the money, badly.
OK, I’m done with this pointless entry.
Monday, 6 November 2006
Food Sex.
If ya wanna get lucky…boy, have I got some juicy insights that just might help you make it happen.
Yesterday, while glued to National Geographic’s Explorations show, I managed to pick up something quite exciting. Food aphrodisiac! (Or maybe I’m on of the last one to find out about this)
Start off with oysters, (of course, heh) with a pinch of lime -- or was it lemon? Hmm, somewhere along the lines lah. They’re rich with zinc and they help, errr, stimulate production of your swim team, libido enhancement and so on. Call that the starter or appetizer. That should start you off well. Caviar works too. If ya have the cash to splash.
Then the main course…grilled Tuna. Works fine with Salmon also. Once you've picked out the key ingredients to seduction, minimize preparation time, and keep it simple. The meal should be satisfying without being heavy and looks are important so it should be attractively presented. God, sorry for not being as articulate in food like Aja or Zach -- or anyone for that matter. I just eat. I don’t really bother remembering what is what, lol. I can’t remember what it does. If I’m not mistaken, it increases your senses. Touch and so on.
Moving on to dessert. Another trick is to ensure that at least one course is eaten with the fingers. For the more erotic, strawberries and raspberries with honey – described as fruit nipples – are a must have on any lover’s plate
Finish off with black chocolate. The Rolls Royce of food aphrodisiac. Then you’re set. Chocolate contains theobromine, a chemical that is related to caffeine and is thought to simulate the brain’s neurotransmitters. One fact is for sure, chocolate contains more antioxidants than red wine. But that doesn’t mean you can’t throw in a couple of glasses of wine (or champagne) along the way. But go easy on it. Too much alcohol (and carbohydrates) will set the two of you to sleep, literally. Remember, you want to sleep with her, not sleep with her. Heh.
"Wow, this chocolate is fantastic!" she will exhale with delight.
That's your que. "Shall we finish this off elsewhere?"
Go already! Go get lucky :)
Yesterday, while glued to National Geographic’s Explorations show, I managed to pick up something quite exciting. Food aphrodisiac! (Or maybe I’m on of the last one to find out about this)
Start off with oysters, (of course, heh) with a pinch of lime -- or was it lemon? Hmm, somewhere along the lines lah. They’re rich with zinc and they help, errr, stimulate production of your swim team, libido enhancement and so on. Call that the starter or appetizer. That should start you off well. Caviar works too. If ya have the cash to splash.
Then the main course…grilled Tuna. Works fine with Salmon also. Once you've picked out the key ingredients to seduction, minimize preparation time, and keep it simple. The meal should be satisfying without being heavy and looks are important so it should be attractively presented. God, sorry for not being as articulate in food like Aja or Zach -- or anyone for that matter. I just eat. I don’t really bother remembering what is what, lol. I can’t remember what it does. If I’m not mistaken, it increases your senses. Touch and so on.
Moving on to dessert. Another trick is to ensure that at least one course is eaten with the fingers. For the more erotic, strawberries and raspberries with honey – described as fruit nipples – are a must have on any lover’s plate
Finish off with black chocolate. The Rolls Royce of food aphrodisiac. Then you’re set. Chocolate contains theobromine, a chemical that is related to caffeine and is thought to simulate the brain’s neurotransmitters. One fact is for sure, chocolate contains more antioxidants than red wine. But that doesn’t mean you can’t throw in a couple of glasses of wine (or champagne) along the way. But go easy on it. Too much alcohol (and carbohydrates) will set the two of you to sleep, literally. Remember, you want to sleep with her, not sleep with her. Heh.
"Wow, this chocolate is fantastic!" she will exhale with delight.
That's your que. "Shall we finish this off elsewhere?"
Go already! Go get lucky :)
Friday, 3 November 2006
The Other Way Round.
It's funny that all this while -- I thought I was a bad person.
Bad for not calling back, bad for completely ignoring her.
Yet, I find myself wondering how is she doing, what is she up to and so.
In the end, it's not her that's hurting -- it was me after all.
Hurt because it failed, aching 'cos it felt almost right, workable.
But I'm left wondering why I keep meeting the wrong ones...
False hopes, crushed dreams, wishful thinking.
I hope it'll end soon.
Bad for not calling back, bad for completely ignoring her.
Yet, I find myself wondering how is she doing, what is she up to and so.
In the end, it's not her that's hurting -- it was me after all.
Hurt because it failed, aching 'cos it felt almost right, workable.
But I'm left wondering why I keep meeting the wrong ones...
False hopes, crushed dreams, wishful thinking.
I hope it'll end soon.
Monday, 30 October 2006
Lost and Found
“Are you sure you didn’t left it in the cemetery?” mom looks at me with worried eyes.
“Yes mom, I’m pretty sure,” I said, walking up and down the house, scouring every corner, “I remember placing it in the car as when we left,” but I still couldn’t find it.
That moment, I felt crushed. I couldn’t find my camera. I went all CSI-mode in search for my camera and found nothing. The feeling was escalating and this isn’t making this Monday any better. Distraught and angry at myself, I stormed out, all emo and drove straight to the cemetery on my way to work this morning. The worst thing that could happen, losing my camera when end of the year is approaching -- when everyone is coming back and parties galore.
I parked my car right infront of the cemetery entrance and begun my search. First stop, my grand aunt’s tombstone, her’s was the nearest and it is also highly unlikely that I’ll find it there. Because it’s so strategic and there’s always people. But I went anyway -- just for good measure.
Nothing.
So I moved on, dad called, “Meng, why don’t you try looking for it at the cemetery, maybe it’s still there.”
“I’m already here, on my way to granny’s now,” I said as I walked up the slightly steep road. It didn’t help that I was wearing a bloody red Man Utd jersey. Everyone stared at me. I get the impression that they think I’m some modern time grave robber.
The phone was still pressed against my right ear, “Search everywhere lah, are you sure you brought it back? Maybe you left it on the roof of your car or something,” dad goes on.
“No way dad, I had it with me when we left,” I said, full of confidence, “Do you remember seeing it when I was releasing air from my tyres at Esso?”
He went on a long errrrrr before he broke out of it, “I can’t recall lah,” he sighs, “But I remember you lugging around this small little black thing with you.”
Gee, that was a lot of help, “Right…anyway, I’m almost at granny’s now, call me if you find anything.”
We hung up and I tip toed my way to my grandma’s tomb. Shrubs were as tall as me and worms were all over the grassy ground. This is turning out to be the worst Monday ever. Doesn’t help that I’m wearing slippers. I arrive at her tomb, looked all over. Couldn’t find it. Started feeling even gloomier though the sun is shining so vibrantly. I said some prayers, spend a few minutes cleaning up the area before moving on.
So I walked on, last stop, my grand dad’s tomb. Every time I visit him, I always get this weird feeling inside. You see, I never met any of my grand dads. Even though – in my weird family tree – I have up to 4 grand dads. Don’t ask, its one bloody long story involving WWI and so on.
I arrive and begun looking around. Nothing. I felt like giving up. There’s nothing more I can do. I began talking to him, praying for my camera to somehow magically reappear. Closed my eyes with my hands clasp together, I pray. I’m not much of a prayer to begin with. Heck, I’m not even superstitious. I don’t know why I did it. I guess I really loved the camera. I picked myself up and dragged myself thru the tall shrubs and worm-laden ground back onto the tarmac. Just less than 30 seconds after I left, dad called;
“Meng ah!!” in his usual I-am-gonna-lecture-you-now tone, he still does this even though I’m already 23 and he knows I just nod, “You ahhh…haiyohh, so careless, here!” he passes the phone to my mom, “Hee hee hee hee, did you drive my car yesterday ah?” she asks.
“No, I was too lazy to go out.”
Still giggling, she says “Sure not? I found your camera, it’s in my car. On the driver’s seat some more!”
I wasn’t really sure how it got there, but then I recall, “Ohhhhhhh, you lah, you said bats were shitting all over your car, so I moved it back lah when we got back,” but what I didn’t know was it has slipped out and landed itself on the front seat. From this point on, my dad burst into laughter, of relief I’m guessing.
After having them laugh at me for 5 mins, we hung up. I stopped walking.
Then it hit me.
No way. Nooo way. I looked back at where my grand dad’s tomb was. Could it? No way…something divine just happen? I stood there like an idiot, beaming in bright red. Did my grand dad just hear me out? I turn and walked back to him. Though I’m more science then superstitions, I thought it’ll be rude not to thank him, for helping the grand son he never saw. So I walked back and gave my thanks and sat there for a bit.
On my way down, I revisited grandma too. Call it creepy but I swear her picture smiled a bit when I was there. Maybe it was the heat or something…
I went to work after that.
“Yes mom, I’m pretty sure,” I said, walking up and down the house, scouring every corner, “I remember placing it in the car as when we left,” but I still couldn’t find it.
That moment, I felt crushed. I couldn’t find my camera. I went all CSI-mode in search for my camera and found nothing. The feeling was escalating and this isn’t making this Monday any better. Distraught and angry at myself, I stormed out, all emo and drove straight to the cemetery on my way to work this morning. The worst thing that could happen, losing my camera when end of the year is approaching -- when everyone is coming back and parties galore.
I parked my car right infront of the cemetery entrance and begun my search. First stop, my grand aunt’s tombstone, her’s was the nearest and it is also highly unlikely that I’ll find it there. Because it’s so strategic and there’s always people. But I went anyway -- just for good measure.
Nothing.
So I moved on, dad called, “Meng, why don’t you try looking for it at the cemetery, maybe it’s still there.”
“I’m already here, on my way to granny’s now,” I said as I walked up the slightly steep road. It didn’t help that I was wearing a bloody red Man Utd jersey. Everyone stared at me. I get the impression that they think I’m some modern time grave robber.
The phone was still pressed against my right ear, “Search everywhere lah, are you sure you brought it back? Maybe you left it on the roof of your car or something,” dad goes on.
“No way dad, I had it with me when we left,” I said, full of confidence, “Do you remember seeing it when I was releasing air from my tyres at Esso?”
He went on a long errrrrr before he broke out of it, “I can’t recall lah,” he sighs, “But I remember you lugging around this small little black thing with you.”
Gee, that was a lot of help, “Right…anyway, I’m almost at granny’s now, call me if you find anything.”
We hung up and I tip toed my way to my grandma’s tomb. Shrubs were as tall as me and worms were all over the grassy ground. This is turning out to be the worst Monday ever. Doesn’t help that I’m wearing slippers. I arrive at her tomb, looked all over. Couldn’t find it. Started feeling even gloomier though the sun is shining so vibrantly. I said some prayers, spend a few minutes cleaning up the area before moving on.
So I walked on, last stop, my grand dad’s tomb. Every time I visit him, I always get this weird feeling inside. You see, I never met any of my grand dads. Even though – in my weird family tree – I have up to 4 grand dads. Don’t ask, its one bloody long story involving WWI and so on.
I arrive and begun looking around. Nothing. I felt like giving up. There’s nothing more I can do. I began talking to him, praying for my camera to somehow magically reappear. Closed my eyes with my hands clasp together, I pray. I’m not much of a prayer to begin with. Heck, I’m not even superstitious. I don’t know why I did it. I guess I really loved the camera. I picked myself up and dragged myself thru the tall shrubs and worm-laden ground back onto the tarmac. Just less than 30 seconds after I left, dad called;
“Meng ah!!” in his usual I-am-gonna-lecture-you-now tone, he still does this even though I’m already 23 and he knows I just nod, “You ahhh…haiyohh, so careless, here!” he passes the phone to my mom, “Hee hee hee hee, did you drive my car yesterday ah?” she asks.
“No, I was too lazy to go out.”
Still giggling, she says “Sure not? I found your camera, it’s in my car. On the driver’s seat some more!”
I wasn’t really sure how it got there, but then I recall, “Ohhhhhhh, you lah, you said bats were shitting all over your car, so I moved it back lah when we got back,” but what I didn’t know was it has slipped out and landed itself on the front seat. From this point on, my dad burst into laughter, of relief I’m guessing.
After having them laugh at me for 5 mins, we hung up. I stopped walking.
Then it hit me.
No way. Nooo way. I looked back at where my grand dad’s tomb was. Could it? No way…something divine just happen? I stood there like an idiot, beaming in bright red. Did my grand dad just hear me out? I turn and walked back to him. Though I’m more science then superstitions, I thought it’ll be rude not to thank him, for helping the grand son he never saw. So I walked back and gave my thanks and sat there for a bit.
On my way down, I revisited grandma too. Call it creepy but I swear her picture smiled a bit when I was there. Maybe it was the heat or something…
I went to work after that.
Sunday, 29 October 2006
Pow!
About a week or two ago -- the monitor started to show signs of age. I was seeing yellow. No, nothing wrong with me eyes. Assuming one of the colour channels are fucked, my screen has a strong yellow-ish tint to it. Heck, everything was yellow, the iPod nano wallpaper I had, showcasing the new colours of green, blue, pink, silver and black, was all in different shades of yellow -- and gold.
At times like these, tasks like Googling becomes impossible. I can’t see the difference between sites I have visited and those I have not.
All in all, the monitor is fucked. Proper fucked.
Have been looking around for LCD monitors with at least 800:1 contrast ratio (1000:1 would be awesome!). No, I’m not materialistic and not the type that won’t settle for mediocrity. It’s just that I have a handful of freelance design stuff coming up and I need a really sharp and accurate LCD monitor. Let's face it, most LCDs these days still can't compete with CRT's clarity and accuracy. Plus, I’m a designer, a graphic designer. I need clarity! Besides, LCD are so slim -- imagine the extra desk space.
Today…after washing my car (shaddup drey), I turn on the monitor.
Well what do you know…
The monitor decided to unfucked itself.
But after 5 minutes
It fucked itself up again. Yellow was in once more.
But I forgot that all things technology always – always has one easy quick fix. You don’t need to have superior knowledge in technology or a big time nerd.
All you need is your fist (or foot) and give it a swift punch (slap or kick).
Voula!
All is well now.
I should start my own business.
At times like these, tasks like Googling becomes impossible. I can’t see the difference between sites I have visited and those I have not.
All in all, the monitor is fucked. Proper fucked.
Have been looking around for LCD monitors with at least 800:1 contrast ratio (1000:1 would be awesome!). No, I’m not materialistic and not the type that won’t settle for mediocrity. It’s just that I have a handful of freelance design stuff coming up and I need a really sharp and accurate LCD monitor. Let's face it, most LCDs these days still can't compete with CRT's clarity and accuracy. Plus, I’m a designer, a graphic designer. I need clarity! Besides, LCD are so slim -- imagine the extra desk space.
Today…after washing my car (shaddup drey), I turn on the monitor.
Well what do you know…
The monitor decided to unfucked itself.
But after 5 minutes
It fucked itself up again. Yellow was in once more.
But I forgot that all things technology always – always has one easy quick fix. You don’t need to have superior knowledge in technology or a big time nerd.
All you need is your fist (or foot) and give it a swift punch (slap or kick).
Voula!
All is well now.
I should start my own business.
Friday, 27 October 2006
Almost White
Of late, it has been tight. Very tight. So tight, I feel my chest is gonna collapse soon. Then you think back at times when you were younger, why your parents are always so stressed…and randomly it seems. This month, I knew I was gonna go thru a rough patch, a real bumpy one.
How do I know? No, I’m not a fortune teller eventhough it says so in the About Me section. But I knew it when I forked out the money to buy an iPod eventhough I could barely afford at that time. But hey, it’s from the States, it’s a hell lot cheaper. So why the hell not? Suffer now lah.
“I’ll go get it on Sunday,” she texts to my phone, halfway round the globe. But that was last week. I had accidentally disrupted her slumber, damn those time-zones!
I haven’t heard from her since. And its pass Sunday already, heck, it’s Friday today…I’m starting to feel iffy -- very iffy. I know she has bought it already. She must have!
I also know she is keeping me in suspense -- on purpose. I’m crazy over any Apple product and she knows that.
So you can imagine the anxiety when I saw her popped online today.
YVONEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE HAVE U HAVE U HAVE UA HEVAUE HAVEUA VAUERV AUEVAURV !?!?!?!?!?!?!
I typed.
Silence. No response.
Then…
The magic words came -- In full Malaysian colours!
“I got ur iPod la,”
WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!
Not only that, I got a sneak preview…
Which I took the liberty to animate and re-construct the webcam moment.
Yes I know. I'm damn kampung. But hey, whoever that knows me well enough knows that I've been eye-ing an iPod for a long time. That's the neighbour's little hands by the way. All the way from Washington.
Now I can sleep at night.
(Von, Char Koay Teow on me!)
How do I know? No, I’m not a fortune teller eventhough it says so in the About Me section. But I knew it when I forked out the money to buy an iPod eventhough I could barely afford at that time. But hey, it’s from the States, it’s a hell lot cheaper. So why the hell not? Suffer now lah.
“I’ll go get it on Sunday,” she texts to my phone, halfway round the globe. But that was last week. I had accidentally disrupted her slumber, damn those time-zones!
I haven’t heard from her since. And its pass Sunday already, heck, it’s Friday today…I’m starting to feel iffy -- very iffy. I know she has bought it already. She must have!
I also know she is keeping me in suspense -- on purpose. I’m crazy over any Apple product and she knows that.
So you can imagine the anxiety when I saw her popped online today.
YVONEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE HAVE U HAVE U HAVE UA HEVAUE HAVEUA VAUERV AUEVAURV !?!?!?!?!?!?!
I typed.
Silence. No response.
Then…
The magic words came -- In full Malaysian colours!
“I got ur iPod la,”
WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!
Not only that, I got a sneak preview…
Which I took the liberty to animate and re-construct the webcam moment.
Yes I know. I'm damn kampung. But hey, whoever that knows me well enough knows that I've been eye-ing an iPod for a long time. That's the neighbour's little hands by the way. All the way from Washington.
Now I can sleep at night.
(Von, Char Koay Teow on me!)
Friday, 20 October 2006
Overdue Photos
OK, here we go. Extremely overdue photo-entries. Here we go, MERDEKA @ Flix. Of course, the Rave was a massive failure. The club did well. I mean, who really cares about shuffling when there are girls in skin tight outfit dancing on bar-tops.
Ian's Last Minute BBQ Party @ Miami Beach Apts. Can you believe these people didn't include Lamb in the list? I had to buy my own personal stash, which they finished it, not me. Ian doing his classic pose.
The KL Trip! I swear, I've never heard of Famous Grouse ever. Famous, konon. Why is there a bird? Were we getting high on bird piss? And stop gimme shit about not climbing Vig, you pull out of it. LOL.
Ian's Last Minute BBQ Party @ Miami Beach Apts. Can you believe these people didn't include Lamb in the list? I had to buy my own personal stash, which they finished it, not me. Ian doing his classic pose.
The KL Trip! I swear, I've never heard of Famous Grouse ever. Famous, konon. Why is there a bird? Were we getting high on bird piss? And stop gimme shit about not climbing Vig, you pull out of it. LOL.
Tuesday, 17 October 2006
Why Oh Why...
Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up every two hours?
If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are flat?
Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough?
Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?
Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?
Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?
Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?
What is the speed of darkness?
Are there specially reserved parking spaces for "normal" people at the Special Olympics?
If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?
If it's true that we are here to help others, what are the others doing here?
Do married people live longer than single ones or does it only seem longer?
Do you cry under water?
How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
Did you ever stop and wonder......
Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze
these pink dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?"
Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there... I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta it's bum."
Why do toasters always have a setting so high that could burn the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't
point to their bum when they ask where the bathroom is?
Why does your Obstetrician, Gynaecologist leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?
Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!
Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream??
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
Stop singing and read on . . . . . . . . . . .
Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at
you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?
If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are flat?
Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough?
Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?
Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?
Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?
Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?
What is the speed of darkness?
Are there specially reserved parking spaces for "normal" people at the Special Olympics?
If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?
If it's true that we are here to help others, what are the others doing here?
Do married people live longer than single ones or does it only seem longer?
Do you cry under water?
How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
Did you ever stop and wonder......
Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze
these pink dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?"
Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there... I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta it's bum."
Why do toasters always have a setting so high that could burn the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't
point to their bum when they ask where the bathroom is?
Why does your Obstetrician, Gynaecologist leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?
Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!
Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream??
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
Stop singing and read on . . . . . . . . . . .
Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at
you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?
Monday, 16 October 2006
Withdrawal
“Maybe it has been 6 years (going on 7) for a reason,” feeling agitated because I do not know where to go from here. Yes, I know, I’m picky. Very picky if I might add. It’s not because I was born like that. I’ve seen, met and attempted. So I know there’s more than just living in a Chinese drama series. I want something real, something personal, something that’s just different from the norm.
Perhaps it was something else that bothered her, “You know, in 3-4 more years you’ll be single for a decade already,” she blatantly pointed that obvious fact out. Not sparing my feelings, or lack there of. Nah, it didn't really bother me.
“Well, don’t put it in that perspective lah,” I said, “Relationship-wise, yeah, but other than that it has been great.”
“The flings?” she adds.
A tiny smile creeps on to my face. I’m looking down at my huge foot, wiggling my toes, “Yeah, it gets me by – physically,” I raised my head and I looked at her, “But -- I’m emotionally…empty. Heck, I don’t even know if I could feel anymore.”
She pinches me.
“AAAUuUgh!, what the fuck was that for?”
“I’m just testing,” that was her justification, “see, you can still feeeeeeeel lah,” she beams.
I’m still clutching my right arm, man, that woman can sure pinch, “I know lah! I meant emotionally,” rubbing my arm, trying in vain to numb the piercing pain. I saw another pinch coming, I sprang out from the steps and ran to the corner, “Don’t lah.”
“You know,” she stood up, with a deep-in-thoughts kind of face . Left elbow across her body, resting her right elbow on it and fingers caressing her chin, “Let’s just say we speak, metaphorically,”
“Uh huh…”
“The pinch represents your emotion,” she starts her lecture-like proceedings, “and when you start feeling something…you run away,” she concludes and look up into the sky (the ceiling to be exact), contemplating, it seems. Then her head tilt back into a normal angle and looked at me. I’ve never seen eyes so big before, “Could it be that you are afraid of commitment?!”
Oh god. That actually made some sense.
“Well, maybe you’re right,” I nodded towards the steps, suggesting we should go back to it, my legs are weary, “No more pinching okay?”
“OK.”
“I mean, yeah, you could be right. But she wasn’t the case,” resting my elbows on my thighs, resting my face on my hands.
“How so?”
I took a long sigh and got out from my hands, “Well, I got the impression that I was in Wah Lai Toi and my life was temporarily inducted into a Chinese drama series.” I struggle to explain further, stuttering, “I saw my whole life, with her, flash before my eyes,” I’m an optimist; I see the good side of things, always. My cup is always half full, “and it was just like those episodes. I can’t, I just can’t commit into something like that.”
“Maybe you…”
I cut in, “And the distance doesn’t really help either. Apparently I can’t seem to save money anymore since buying the car.” I sighed. “You were saying?”
She seemed puzzled, as if her prophecy of me being afraid of commitment has disintegrated and her short-lived career as a fore-teller has crumbled, “Nevermind. Then how on earth did you get to know her?”
“Thru friends…” I said, “But for all the wrong reasons.”
“What wrong reasons?” her head bounced a little.
“What else?” I winked. ;)
“Oh,” her mouth gaped like a whale-shark, “You bastard!” she pinches me again and refuse to let go.
“AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!” I begged her to let go, she took her sweet time contemplating that decision. She did let go in the end. “You liar!” I pinched her back, but a weak pathetic one.
“Aaaaaaaaaa…” and a tirade of mini slaps on my hands rained on me.
After all the laughter and 10 seconds of pure high, we came back to our senses. “So, what are you gonna do about it?”
“I don’t know. I really don’t”
“Well, take it easy lah,” she advises me, “I think you need to sleep on it. And when you wake up – you should know what to do then. You need to clear your head of Wah Lai Toi.”
“Hahaha, yeah, guess so.”
“I think we should get going,” says she as she stood up and took a mini stretch. I poked her ribs, to tickle, “Eh!”
:)
“Yeap, the security guards might think we’re planning to rob the bank.” I say, “I need to go home anyway, sleepy. I just got back.” We have been seating on the steps in front of Maybank for almost 30 minutes.
“Ooo okay, why are you taking out so much money anyway?”
“Oh, I wanna get an iPod, my neighbour’s in the States. It’s damn cheap there.”
“And you say you can’t save money?” she sepet-ed her eyes, as if she’s onto something.
“Eh eh, no lah, I’m forcing myself to get it wan okay. I have no idea how am I gonna survive on 6 Ringgit for the rest of the month,” I show her the receipt which made her chuckle, “But here’s the strange bit, I’m not even worried!”
“Well, if you need to loan some…”
“Nah, it’s OK, I’ll be fine. Thanks anyway,” I cut in again.
“OK,” she peeked at her small wrist watch, “I gotta go, they’re waiting for me. It’s been great catching up. I heard Zach got married,”
“Yeah, he did.”
“Wow,” it took her 5 seconds to snap out of it, she shook her head a little, “OK OK, I gotta go, it’s been great chatting, I’ll see you around. Take care.”
“OK, you take care yeah?” we exchange hugs, “I’ll see you when I see you lah,”
She rode off in her car, I got into mine, placing every valuable note into a special envelope. Then I thought about it, about her, what am I gonna do about it. That weekend was deadline day, the day I really give it a go. It was fun while it lasted, but I found myself peeking at my wristband, assuming there’s a watch there but there isn’t, only to dig out my phone to check the time now and then. I could have been bored to a certain extend and was in denial about it – or just being nice.
I guess, in the end, it didn’t work out too well for me. The search goes on.
Perhaps it was something else that bothered her, “You know, in 3-4 more years you’ll be single for a decade already,” she blatantly pointed that obvious fact out. Not sparing my feelings, or lack there of. Nah, it didn't really bother me.
“Well, don’t put it in that perspective lah,” I said, “Relationship-wise, yeah, but other than that it has been great.”
“The flings?” she adds.
A tiny smile creeps on to my face. I’m looking down at my huge foot, wiggling my toes, “Yeah, it gets me by – physically,” I raised my head and I looked at her, “But -- I’m emotionally…empty. Heck, I don’t even know if I could feel anymore.”
She pinches me.
“AAAUuUgh!, what the fuck was that for?”
“I’m just testing,” that was her justification, “see, you can still feeeeeeeel lah,” she beams.
I’m still clutching my right arm, man, that woman can sure pinch, “I know lah! I meant emotionally,” rubbing my arm, trying in vain to numb the piercing pain. I saw another pinch coming, I sprang out from the steps and ran to the corner, “Don’t lah.”
“You know,” she stood up, with a deep-in-thoughts kind of face . Left elbow across her body, resting her right elbow on it and fingers caressing her chin, “Let’s just say we speak, metaphorically,”
“Uh huh…”
“The pinch represents your emotion,” she starts her lecture-like proceedings, “and when you start feeling something…you run away,” she concludes and look up into the sky (the ceiling to be exact), contemplating, it seems. Then her head tilt back into a normal angle and looked at me. I’ve never seen eyes so big before, “Could it be that you are afraid of commitment?!”
Oh god. That actually made some sense.
“Well, maybe you’re right,” I nodded towards the steps, suggesting we should go back to it, my legs are weary, “No more pinching okay?”
“OK.”
“I mean, yeah, you could be right. But she wasn’t the case,” resting my elbows on my thighs, resting my face on my hands.
“How so?”
I took a long sigh and got out from my hands, “Well, I got the impression that I was in Wah Lai Toi and my life was temporarily inducted into a Chinese drama series.” I struggle to explain further, stuttering, “I saw my whole life, with her, flash before my eyes,” I’m an optimist; I see the good side of things, always. My cup is always half full, “and it was just like those episodes. I can’t, I just can’t commit into something like that.”
“Maybe you…”
I cut in, “And the distance doesn’t really help either. Apparently I can’t seem to save money anymore since buying the car.” I sighed. “You were saying?”
She seemed puzzled, as if her prophecy of me being afraid of commitment has disintegrated and her short-lived career as a fore-teller has crumbled, “Nevermind. Then how on earth did you get to know her?”
“Thru friends…” I said, “But for all the wrong reasons.”
“What wrong reasons?” her head bounced a little.
“What else?” I winked. ;)
“Oh,” her mouth gaped like a whale-shark, “You bastard!” she pinches me again and refuse to let go.
“AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!” I begged her to let go, she took her sweet time contemplating that decision. She did let go in the end. “You liar!” I pinched her back, but a weak pathetic one.
“Aaaaaaaaaa…” and a tirade of mini slaps on my hands rained on me.
After all the laughter and 10 seconds of pure high, we came back to our senses. “So, what are you gonna do about it?”
“I don’t know. I really don’t”
“Well, take it easy lah,” she advises me, “I think you need to sleep on it. And when you wake up – you should know what to do then. You need to clear your head of Wah Lai Toi.”
“Hahaha, yeah, guess so.”
“I think we should get going,” says she as she stood up and took a mini stretch. I poked her ribs, to tickle, “Eh!”
:)
“Yeap, the security guards might think we’re planning to rob the bank.” I say, “I need to go home anyway, sleepy. I just got back.” We have been seating on the steps in front of Maybank for almost 30 minutes.
“Ooo okay, why are you taking out so much money anyway?”
“Oh, I wanna get an iPod, my neighbour’s in the States. It’s damn cheap there.”
“And you say you can’t save money?” she sepet-ed her eyes, as if she’s onto something.
“Eh eh, no lah, I’m forcing myself to get it wan okay. I have no idea how am I gonna survive on 6 Ringgit for the rest of the month,” I show her the receipt which made her chuckle, “But here’s the strange bit, I’m not even worried!”
“Well, if you need to loan some…”
“Nah, it’s OK, I’ll be fine. Thanks anyway,” I cut in again.
“OK,” she peeked at her small wrist watch, “I gotta go, they’re waiting for me. It’s been great catching up. I heard Zach got married,”
“Yeah, he did.”
“Wow,” it took her 5 seconds to snap out of it, she shook her head a little, “OK OK, I gotta go, it’s been great chatting, I’ll see you around. Take care.”
“OK, you take care yeah?” we exchange hugs, “I’ll see you when I see you lah,”
She rode off in her car, I got into mine, placing every valuable note into a special envelope. Then I thought about it, about her, what am I gonna do about it. That weekend was deadline day, the day I really give it a go. It was fun while it lasted, but I found myself peeking at my wristband, assuming there’s a watch there but there isn’t, only to dig out my phone to check the time now and then. I could have been bored to a certain extend and was in denial about it – or just being nice.
I guess, in the end, it didn’t work out too well for me. The search goes on.
Friday, 13 October 2006
Because I Just Feel Like Blogging
Another weekend of travel and breaking routine.
I’m so broke and I’ve not even left the island yet.
When she gets back from the States, I expect to see something white.
The phone and camera is still charging.
They didn’t know Uncle had moved on.
I’ve got 15 minutes left before I split this joint.
I guess I better get going.
KL! Woooooooooooo…
I’m so broke and I’ve not even left the island yet.
When she gets back from the States, I expect to see something white.
The phone and camera is still charging.
They didn’t know Uncle had moved on.
I’ve got 15 minutes left before I split this joint.
I guess I better get going.
KL! Woooooooooooo…
Wednesday, 11 October 2006
Because I Just Feel Like Writting
It has been an emotional roller coaster ride of late. I can’t seem to keep a consistent need, attitude and state of mind. It’s funny how one can feel so blissful and be so miserable in a space of just a few days.
Puffing a light cloud of smoke, she says “But this isn’t what you want,” while she slowly extends her arm, creating a distant between her and the cigarette, sitting on the steps.
I realize where she is coming from, we’ve talked about this before, “I know. This isn’t what I want if it does prove to be just another game,” I declare, “But god knows why I keep falling back into the vicious cycle,” I sighed and lean against the wall behind me which cause my arm and black t-shirt to stain -- of white. I guess you do have to be careful of what you wish for.
Gazing into the horizon, I spot rain, “The rain is heading our way,” Now that’s a sudden change in topic.
Then we talked about a certain medical condition that was featured in House, which then I made a random remark, “I just don’t want to get close with my phone, again,” knowing that my past failures are due to that. For some, it helps -- but for others, it can be very destructive. It has been very vindictive to me. Not to mention the dent on my account. I don’t want to go down that alleyway all over again.
My phone sings to the tune of Bob Marley’s Is This Love. How ironic.
Ah Liew’s picture appears; I pick up, “Supp matcha?”
“MatchAaAAaAaaaa…” he shrieks in his usual but sometimes strange sense of enthusiasm, “Eh, I ask you something ah…”
“Supp?”
“The other day, got thunderstorm…very loud, then now my PC cannot turn on, no signal at all lah! How?! @#$”
With my superior knowledge in computers -- I said, “Your comp is fried, dude.”
“Proper fried?”
“Most probably. Yeah.”
“Oh fuck,” his voice dims into a subterranean gloom, “What about the modem?? How can I know for sure it’s fried??” refusing to admit defeat.
“Open up the CPU and check it out lah,” I propose.
Saddened by the bad news, he went on, “Aduh, if all fry how ah??”
“Usually it’s the power supply only lah, but who knows…shit happens.”
Coming to terms with it, he snaps out from his gloominess, “OK, OK, nevermind, let’s go for lunch one of these days, a good lunch, my repayment for the logo you did for me.”
I did forget to design the logo for him until he called again. Have been busy with work now that the festive seasons are coming unrelentingly – but lucky me, I manage to make up for lost time and still come up with something pretty.
“Good lunch, eh? Hahah, ok TAU KEH. Sure. But soon lah, I’m going to KL this Friday.” I replied.
“Oh you are?”
“Yeah I am,” I told him while holding my ticket, playing with the light bouncing off the glossy paper they use. Trying to catch my reflection.
“Cool man, cool,” he says, “Have fun man, we’ll lunch tomorrow lah, cool?”
“Oh, I sure will. And let's eat kau kau tomorrow!”
Just after we hung up, I noticed the ticket reads, ‘Seat No.: 21’
Crap. Not again. It’s that bloody seat above the wheel/suspension/next to the emergency exit.
Puffing a light cloud of smoke, she says “But this isn’t what you want,” while she slowly extends her arm, creating a distant between her and the cigarette, sitting on the steps.
I realize where she is coming from, we’ve talked about this before, “I know. This isn’t what I want if it does prove to be just another game,” I declare, “But god knows why I keep falling back into the vicious cycle,” I sighed and lean against the wall behind me which cause my arm and black t-shirt to stain -- of white. I guess you do have to be careful of what you wish for.
Gazing into the horizon, I spot rain, “The rain is heading our way,” Now that’s a sudden change in topic.
Then we talked about a certain medical condition that was featured in House, which then I made a random remark, “I just don’t want to get close with my phone, again,” knowing that my past failures are due to that. For some, it helps -- but for others, it can be very destructive. It has been very vindictive to me. Not to mention the dent on my account. I don’t want to go down that alleyway all over again.
My phone sings to the tune of Bob Marley’s Is This Love. How ironic.
Ah Liew’s picture appears; I pick up, “Supp matcha?”
“MatchAaAAaAaaaa…” he shrieks in his usual but sometimes strange sense of enthusiasm, “Eh, I ask you something ah…”
“Supp?”
“The other day, got thunderstorm…very loud, then now my PC cannot turn on, no signal at all lah! How?! @#$”
With my superior knowledge in computers -- I said, “Your comp is fried, dude.”
“Proper fried?”
“Most probably. Yeah.”
“Oh fuck,” his voice dims into a subterranean gloom, “What about the modem?? How can I know for sure it’s fried??” refusing to admit defeat.
“Open up the CPU and check it out lah,” I propose.
Saddened by the bad news, he went on, “Aduh, if all fry how ah??”
“Usually it’s the power supply only lah, but who knows…shit happens.”
Coming to terms with it, he snaps out from his gloominess, “OK, OK, nevermind, let’s go for lunch one of these days, a good lunch, my repayment for the logo you did for me.”
I did forget to design the logo for him until he called again. Have been busy with work now that the festive seasons are coming unrelentingly – but lucky me, I manage to make up for lost time and still come up with something pretty.
“Good lunch, eh? Hahah, ok TAU KEH. Sure. But soon lah, I’m going to KL this Friday.” I replied.
“Oh you are?”
“Yeah I am,” I told him while holding my ticket, playing with the light bouncing off the glossy paper they use. Trying to catch my reflection.
“Cool man, cool,” he says, “Have fun man, we’ll lunch tomorrow lah, cool?”
“Oh, I sure will. And let's eat kau kau tomorrow!”
Just after we hung up, I noticed the ticket reads, ‘Seat No.: 21’
Crap. Not again. It’s that bloody seat above the wheel/suspension/next to the emergency exit.
Saturday, 7 October 2006
Blunt Scissor
Being almost 190cm and skinny as hell, it’s almost impossible for people to resist from calling me Crouch when I step into any pitch.
On Wednesday, we had our usual Futsal outing. I invited the Ah Neh to come join us since he’s back. And when one of my team mates’ shot was deflected, the ball took a bounce and floated just slightly higher above my head. It was my calling, it was destined, it was fate that I must do what he did in midweek against Galatasaray.
So I did that. An exact carbon copy, but on a Futsal pitch and in Asia.
But then, this Ah Neh, who has a knack of putting in nuts between my shot and the goal in recent times, was standing right smack at the center of goal. Lucky him, no family jewels were painfully struck, all he had to do was catch the ball as it flew straight to him and made a comfortable save.
“You fucker lah Vig, real fucker. Almost did a Crouch wei!!!”
On Wednesday, we had our usual Futsal outing. I invited the Ah Neh to come join us since he’s back. And when one of my team mates’ shot was deflected, the ball took a bounce and floated just slightly higher above my head. It was my calling, it was destined, it was fate that I must do what he did in midweek against Galatasaray.
So I did that. An exact carbon copy, but on a Futsal pitch and in Asia.
But then, this Ah Neh, who has a knack of putting in nuts between my shot and the goal in recent times, was standing right smack at the center of goal. Lucky him, no family jewels were painfully struck, all he had to do was catch the ball as it flew straight to him and made a comfortable save.“You fucker lah Vig, real fucker. Almost did a Crouch wei!!!”
Wednesday, 4 October 2006
Weirdnesday
Today was quite embarrassing.
I’m not much of a bank-type person, heck, I hate to have anything to do with banks. They overwhelm you with ridiculous load of unnecessary information even though all you wanted was an update on the bank book. Let's not go into loan-application. Goodness, I have to sign until I forgot how my signature looked like! Strange how my sis is a banker.
Anyhoo…
Me. Scenario, at the bank, Maybank at Gelugor to be precise.
Suffering the consequences of banking my pay-cheque late (and on a Friday). So right now as it is I’m so pathetically broke. Kept my fingers crossed and went up the stairs, straight to the ATM and did my thing. Toot Toot Toot. Wooohoooo. Mah Nehhhh!! So I key in my amount and ka chik ka chik my ATM card pops out. Thus placing my skinny fingers on the part where the money should gracefully slide out. But that damn thing can show temper man! That damn machine just threw my money out as if I’m in some all-you-can-grab money chamber! Kanneh…I took out a lot somemore man. On the bright side, there’s only the guard to laugh at me and I didn’t have to fend off those gambling-addict Ah Bengs.
“Apasal cam ni??” I snapped.
“ (Heh heh heh) Tak tau! (heh heh heh)”
Then my mom calls, “Meng ah…GOT MONKEYS INSIDE OUR HOUSE WEI!!! @#$%!!!!! THEY @#$% CAME FROM THE @#$% BALCONY!!! I HAD TO SCREAM!!! I THOUGHT SOMEONE BROKE IN!! THEY WERE TRYING TO STEAL YOUR PRINGLES!”
WTF?
What the hell is wrong with today man?
I’m not much of a bank-type person, heck, I hate to have anything to do with banks. They overwhelm you with ridiculous load of unnecessary information even though all you wanted was an update on the bank book. Let's not go into loan-application. Goodness, I have to sign until I forgot how my signature looked like! Strange how my sis is a banker.
Anyhoo…
Me. Scenario, at the bank, Maybank at Gelugor to be precise.
Suffering the consequences of banking my pay-cheque late (and on a Friday). So right now as it is I’m so pathetically broke. Kept my fingers crossed and went up the stairs, straight to the ATM and did my thing. Toot Toot Toot. Wooohoooo. Mah Nehhhh!! So I key in my amount and ka chik ka chik my ATM card pops out. Thus placing my skinny fingers on the part where the money should gracefully slide out. But that damn thing can show temper man! That damn machine just threw my money out as if I’m in some all-you-can-grab money chamber! Kanneh…I took out a lot somemore man. On the bright side, there’s only the guard to laugh at me and I didn’t have to fend off those gambling-addict Ah Bengs.
“Apasal cam ni??” I snapped.
“ (Heh heh heh) Tak tau! (heh heh heh)”
Then my mom calls, “Meng ah…GOT MONKEYS INSIDE OUR HOUSE WEI!!! @#$%!!!!! THEY @#$% CAME FROM THE @#$% BALCONY!!! I HAD TO SCREAM!!! I THOUGHT SOMEONE BROKE IN!! THEY WERE TRYING TO STEAL YOUR PRINGLES!”
WTF?
What the hell is wrong with today man?
Tuesday, 3 October 2006
Chasing. Bending. Posing
My bad for the tardiness.
But I did receive a lil email from Mr. Blogspot telling me that I could now hide certain entries and limit access…interesting stuff. It’s about bloody time.
I’ve been bombarded with so much work that I burst into laughter (in my head only), thinking that this is just about as bad as it could get. Then that’s when shit happens. Now, I’m covering for my colleagues while they themselves are chasing their clients, chasing their freedom. Sounds a bit melodramatic, innit? But that’s the reality. They, the clients, are not the freedom we are hunting, but of what they stand for which is the work that we dread but ultimately it is what we were paid to do and when it’s done, that’s when we expect some sense of liberation at the end of it. Just to justify everything, make sense of it all and recharge.
“You know, you should really give this a go,” says her on my mobile, now so over-heated, it feels like a mini ear-heater for rainy days, just for one ear, “you’re so stretchy.”
I would have preferred the phrase bendy, “Hah, so that means I don’t have to,” trying to get out from it, because in my head, it’s bordering the line and I don’t feel comfortable getting into weird angles and sustaining. But her perseverance got the best of me, “OK OK, I’ll do it if it means so much to you.” But I did want to check it out, just for the fun of it, for experience…and maybe show-off a little, just a little. Really. Not everyone is born bendy. Now my back hurts.
We have an article coming up in The Star’s BizWeek section, after Raya. So be sure to check it out. No, we didn’t write an article; they wrote one…a wee bit about us (mostly him) and about advertising in Penang. But when we travelled down to KL, in this fella’s car, I knew it would be impossible to even get a sentence in the article. He’s a 30-year veteran in the field, heck, his work-age is older than my age! I’d be lucky to even get a word. So the whole trip, I psyched myself out for poses. Call it Plan B. Since Audrey says I feed on attention, not seek it, why the hell not? After all, they are gonna get the whole page to themselves. I’m more camera-friendly anyway, let me have the shots :P, eh, I pasang ok…now come to think of it, what was with the emo pose anyway?
The photographer goes around shooting our photographs the minute we arrive, “Oh yes, oh yes, own it, own it,” he mutters, “Own the shot, oh yeah marvellous…”
Wah, damn rock star.
I saw him aiming and focusing on me before recomposing in most shots -- I get the impression I’m in focus and everyone else is blurred out. Oh, that’d be uber-cool!
But I did receive a lil email from Mr. Blogspot telling me that I could now hide certain entries and limit access…interesting stuff. It’s about bloody time.
I’ve been bombarded with so much work that I burst into laughter (in my head only), thinking that this is just about as bad as it could get. Then that’s when shit happens. Now, I’m covering for my colleagues while they themselves are chasing their clients, chasing their freedom. Sounds a bit melodramatic, innit? But that’s the reality. They, the clients, are not the freedom we are hunting, but of what they stand for which is the work that we dread but ultimately it is what we were paid to do and when it’s done, that’s when we expect some sense of liberation at the end of it. Just to justify everything, make sense of it all and recharge.
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“You know, you should really give this a go,” says her on my mobile, now so over-heated, it feels like a mini ear-heater for rainy days, just for one ear, “you’re so stretchy.”
I would have preferred the phrase bendy, “Hah, so that means I don’t have to,” trying to get out from it, because in my head, it’s bordering the line and I don’t feel comfortable getting into weird angles and sustaining. But her perseverance got the best of me, “OK OK, I’ll do it if it means so much to you.” But I did want to check it out, just for the fun of it, for experience…and maybe show-off a little, just a little. Really. Not everyone is born bendy. Now my back hurts.
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We have an article coming up in The Star’s BizWeek section, after Raya. So be sure to check it out. No, we didn’t write an article; they wrote one…a wee bit about us (mostly him) and about advertising in Penang. But when we travelled down to KL, in this fella’s car, I knew it would be impossible to even get a sentence in the article. He’s a 30-year veteran in the field, heck, his work-age is older than my age! I’d be lucky to even get a word. So the whole trip, I psyched myself out for poses. Call it Plan B. Since Audrey says I feed on attention, not seek it, why the hell not? After all, they are gonna get the whole page to themselves. I’m more camera-friendly anyway, let me have the shots :P, eh, I pasang ok…now come to think of it, what was with the emo pose anyway?
The photographer goes around shooting our photographs the minute we arrive, “Oh yes, oh yes, own it, own it,” he mutters, “Own the shot, oh yeah marvellous…”
Wah, damn rock star.
I saw him aiming and focusing on me before recomposing in most shots -- I get the impression I’m in focus and everyone else is blurred out. Oh, that’d be uber-cool!
Saturday, 23 September 2006
Long Goodbye
Yesterday, (though I have never seen a single episode of it) was the grand finale of the much (or so) awaited One In A Million talent show. And despite being the finale, interest was lacking. I mean, there is so much reality show out there and it’s starting to be very repetitive. But anyhoo…
I watched it to humour my parents. Cos sis said it was nice. So I watched. Intro…ok, nothing great. Expected. Then the 3 finalists did a 3-way duet. OK…still fine. But if you look closely, the fellow with long hair kept spacing out and miss out on the group singing part. Not to mention the faulty mic that didn’t work when he was queried.
Then here’s the strangest bit. After the performance, they decided to send one off…barely 15 minutes into the show, 1 contestant’s dream is smashed right infront of him. Then I guess, the producer felt awful and decided to let him stay…WTF?
But the weirdest, strangest and ridiculous part was the ending. With 30 minutes to spare, I’m guessing they over-calculated the air time and mistakenly booked a 2 hour slot. Thus, they decided to throw in an after-show, show. Which was really, unnecessary. Not only did the TV hosts speak horrible English with the fakest of accent/slang. They weren’t even prepared for it and they keep up their lame antics and pathetic jokes after another. Not to mention the stupid questions they ask the audience. What do you expect lah, stupid questions = stupid answers.
Here’s the best part…they even broadcast the press conference…(no, that’s not the best part, but here it is)…with, of course, the winner, Suki, the judges, producer…and…the 2 losers. I mean, as if losing a chance at 1 million isn’t bad enough, they glorified their failure by including them on the press conference broadcast live to the entire nation. Which led to the long haired guy making a somewhat bitter remark,
“Yeah of course I’m disappointed that I didn’t win. But in the end, I only have myself to blame,” he said with a bitter sore-loser fake smile printed on his face, “I did not went campaigning for votes…like THEY did,” pointing at them with resentment, “I didn’t really do anything, really.”
Gee…go figure. One million Ringgit to be won and you couldn’t even do some self-promotion. How to be singer lah like that? I’m guessing he doesn’t even realize that out of the 1 million, you only get a fraction of it as the rest goes straight into producing your debut album. But I pity him. He lost, twice. On the same night. Must be tough.
Everyone seemed frightened to be in the press conference, except Paul Moss, who at least manages to crack up a few jokes to ease the tension. You could sense the anxiety on Fat Fabes…scared to death.
Back to the TV hosts. The short girl was blabbing something which no one could hear her, thanks to her dumbass co-host who did not realize he was holding the mic to himself, even when she specifically requested, “Can I hold the mic ah? I didn’t hold the mic at all tonight!” she looked up and grasps the mic and attempts to pry it from him, “Gimme lah.”
“OK OK,” says he, but still holding, refusing to let her hold it for herself…and in the end, crouch a little, still holding the mic, with her still frantically trying. In the end, both of them are holding the mic. WTF?!
All in all, the ending was just too long-winded. Waaay too long-winded.
But in retrospect, it was damn funny.
I watched it to humour my parents. Cos sis said it was nice. So I watched. Intro…ok, nothing great. Expected. Then the 3 finalists did a 3-way duet. OK…still fine. But if you look closely, the fellow with long hair kept spacing out and miss out on the group singing part. Not to mention the faulty mic that didn’t work when he was queried.
Then here’s the strangest bit. After the performance, they decided to send one off…barely 15 minutes into the show, 1 contestant’s dream is smashed right infront of him. Then I guess, the producer felt awful and decided to let him stay…WTF?
But the weirdest, strangest and ridiculous part was the ending. With 30 minutes to spare, I’m guessing they over-calculated the air time and mistakenly booked a 2 hour slot. Thus, they decided to throw in an after-show, show. Which was really, unnecessary. Not only did the TV hosts speak horrible English with the fakest of accent/slang. They weren’t even prepared for it and they keep up their lame antics and pathetic jokes after another. Not to mention the stupid questions they ask the audience. What do you expect lah, stupid questions = stupid answers.
Here’s the best part…they even broadcast the press conference…(no, that’s not the best part, but here it is)…with, of course, the winner, Suki, the judges, producer…and…the 2 losers. I mean, as if losing a chance at 1 million isn’t bad enough, they glorified their failure by including them on the press conference broadcast live to the entire nation. Which led to the long haired guy making a somewhat bitter remark,
“Yeah of course I’m disappointed that I didn’t win. But in the end, I only have myself to blame,” he said with a bitter sore-loser fake smile printed on his face, “I did not went campaigning for votes…like THEY did,” pointing at them with resentment, “I didn’t really do anything, really.”
Gee…go figure. One million Ringgit to be won and you couldn’t even do some self-promotion. How to be singer lah like that? I’m guessing he doesn’t even realize that out of the 1 million, you only get a fraction of it as the rest goes straight into producing your debut album. But I pity him. He lost, twice. On the same night. Must be tough.
Everyone seemed frightened to be in the press conference, except Paul Moss, who at least manages to crack up a few jokes to ease the tension. You could sense the anxiety on Fat Fabes…scared to death.
Back to the TV hosts. The short girl was blabbing something which no one could hear her, thanks to her dumbass co-host who did not realize he was holding the mic to himself, even when she specifically requested, “Can I hold the mic ah? I didn’t hold the mic at all tonight!” she looked up and grasps the mic and attempts to pry it from him, “Gimme lah.”
“OK OK,” says he, but still holding, refusing to let her hold it for herself…and in the end, crouch a little, still holding the mic, with her still frantically trying. In the end, both of them are holding the mic. WTF?!
All in all, the ending was just too long-winded. Waaay too long-winded.
But in retrospect, it was damn funny.
Thursday, 14 September 2006
Hoooooliday!
I’m going to KL, woot woot.
I’m going to KL, woot woot.
I’m going…ooookay, nuff.
Yes, tomorrow, I’m gonna visit the city that made me the designer I am today. I remember my last trip wasn’t a pleasant one. I hope this one justifies it.
I wanna buy that FM Transmitter Vig has been gloating about. I wanna climb that bloody wall Vig has been bragging about. I wanna meet them. And of course, Ian…matchaaaa. Limpek lai liao! One month late. But here’s an over used cliché that will make you running to the sink or toilet bowl.
Better late than never, eh?
I added the “eh?” for a touch of originality. Heh. Dei, Cat-woman, Ya, you hear me. I’m coming!! Let me meet your cicak friend ya? Maybe it’ll like me more. The bar still fully stocked? If not….WHY NOT?!?! What the hell have you been doing ah? Working, konon.
Will we club? Hmmm, do I want club? That will depend on how the hectic Saturday turns out. I have this tendency to over do things in KL. I mean come on, Kampung boy here. So what if I’m guilty of trying too hard? LOL. Bite me.
“If you drive down ah, I’ll quit my bloody job and follow you back!” Vig declares on the phone while we were sorting the transport itinery.
Sorry Vig, it’s gonna cost me an island to drive down with just me and Ryan. I’ll come save you next time lah. I promise. After all, you have that wall to climb, right?
See you guys soon.
(Happy Birthday, Audrey!)
I’m going to KL, woot woot.
I’m going…ooookay, nuff.
Yes, tomorrow, I’m gonna visit the city that made me the designer I am today. I remember my last trip wasn’t a pleasant one. I hope this one justifies it.
I wanna buy that FM Transmitter Vig has been gloating about. I wanna climb that bloody wall Vig has been bragging about. I wanna meet them. And of course, Ian…matchaaaa. Limpek lai liao! One month late. But here’s an over used cliché that will make you running to the sink or toilet bowl.
Better late than never, eh?
I added the “eh?” for a touch of originality. Heh. Dei, Cat-woman, Ya, you hear me. I’m coming!! Let me meet your cicak friend ya? Maybe it’ll like me more. The bar still fully stocked? If not….WHY NOT?!?! What the hell have you been doing ah? Working, konon.
Will we club? Hmmm, do I want club? That will depend on how the hectic Saturday turns out. I have this tendency to over do things in KL. I mean come on, Kampung boy here. So what if I’m guilty of trying too hard? LOL. Bite me.
“If you drive down ah, I’ll quit my bloody job and follow you back!” Vig declares on the phone while we were sorting the transport itinery.
Sorry Vig, it’s gonna cost me an island to drive down with just me and Ryan. I’ll come save you next time lah. I promise. After all, you have that wall to climb, right?
See you guys soon.
(Happy Birthday, Audrey!)
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